Sometimes life is anything but glamorous.

Big news this week - Obama's coming.  For some reason, this makes me angry. I think it just throws a wrench in the daily in and out that has me displeased. That, and no one I can talk to has a good reason they like him. Still. It's almost August people. There should be a reason to like your presidential candidate by this point. Also, the FO's wont let me help.  And today sucks, so I need a reason to get happy.  Handing out tickets and registering voters would make me happy. But instead I get to tell angry out-of-towners that I can't reserve them tickets over the phone. Rar.

The mailman makes me happy though. He's just such a friendly and cheerful sort of man.

Other reasons life is unglamorous: 

- It took me 35 minutes to get my coffee at Starbucks today. 

- I got a $102.86 speeding ticket on my first time getting pulled over, EVER, for going only ten miles over on the highway

- When I drove the speed limit, I got tailgated and honked at

A. Carol at AARP in Iowa also makes me happy, because he was very pleasant on the phone.  Not an ass. 

Instead of being involved with the Obama event, I am making certain we have all the flood victims properly tagged in the voter system.  Which I suppose is important, but the majority are already tagged, so it's a lot of repeating already finished work. Oh well. 

I'm so mad about that speeding ticket. And that I can't be registering people to vote.  Cause the new FO's don't know what the hell they're doing.  And I do. Grr. And I did all the work to set up for the ticket process... and they probably are going to ask me to man the office during the event, so I still won't be able to see Obama and be suaded to jump on the band wagon.

I just hate that I don't know what he stands for. I know what Clinton and Edwards stood for. I don't know what Obama stands for.  What's his policy baby?  What are his priorities, what does he want to to? No one knows. Many people are charismatic and have efficient and friendly staffs. That shouldn't be why they get elected president. As uncharismatic as Art (Nymphadora's candidate) is, I know what he stands for and why I should elect him in the fall.  I'm voting for Obama because I believe in his party and I don't believe in his opponent.  Isn't that sad?  

God, I'm so disenchanted right now. 

And now the press is here, so the Obama people are erasing all sign of other local candidates from the shot. And I'm gonna go for a walk and cry a little. 

Eureka/OS!M

Today I had a breakthrough.

I've been loving my internship. I'm working with a bunch of young, energized people who believe in what they are doing (worlds away from interning with the State of Minnesota in the Executive branch a couple years ago, and from waitressing 40 hours a week). My work is usually challenging/interesting and I feel like I'm actually accomplishing something day in and out. But I still felt some of the latent frustration that I've become very familiar with. It's a frustration that denotes some level of apathy, boredom, or discomfort/disagreement with what I'm doing or being required to do. Like upselling. I hate upselling. Why should I waste my time convincing someone to buy a drink made with a more expensive brand of vodka or buy a full sized salad when they really don't care about the brand of alcohol or only want to eat a half salad? So each time I do it... I feel slightly disgusted with myself, even though my managers praise me at the end of the night when I have a slightly higher guest check average.

Anyway, I was feeling a bit like that, despite being generally very satisfied with my Democratic internship. It was definitely not overwhelming, nor something I thought about or noticed everyday. It just kind of nagged me from time to time. A little reminder that, while I may enjoy myself this summer, campaigning may not be the career for me. I couldn't put my finger on or define the issue, but it existed. Today while talking with D. about upcoming events, I finally figured out what it was - my unending idealism is poking its head into my life once again.

I have this belief that if people are empowered and educated on politicians, parties and policies, they will be willing and able to vote, and the sum of that vote would be a pretty fair indicator of what is best for the nation as a whole. I guess I just believe democracy should work, or something. That it could and should actually function as we teach our children it does. Because when you talk about it like that, it makes sense and seems fair and... something... Anyway, campaigning deludes this, destroys it. We spend so much time trying to figure out how to con and convince or otherwise talk or bribe or trick people into voting for our candidate or party. We're basically upselling (or selling in general) our party's product. And that sales mindset just doesn't ever sit well with me. I know I'm an everyday product and victim and active participant of/in the advertising industry and market economy. I realize that. I'm just not ready to like it.

That's what's happened to me in college. In high school people could tell me I was idealistic until they were blue in the face, and I wouldn't believe them. College has taught me that I am idealistic, but while I have come to realize and accept this, I'm just not willing to give it up yet. And people think that's strange, but without idealism and striving for something better - actually better, not merely tricking everyone into thinking it's better - where will we be? Our culture and society will stagnate. Innovation, working towards a goal (an ideal), striving to become more is a cornerstone of being human and is key to human progress. So, I'm not willing to give up my idealism. I just can't. It's a pretty integral part of me. Deal with it, all you cynics.

I'm also not willing to resign myself to daily cheerfulness and not hating my job. Moving forward, I'm going to look for careers and jobs where I don't have an underlying nagging coming from my idealistic side. I'm going to look for something that satisfies that part of my personality too.

Back from Vacation

This has been my life for the last three weeks:

July 6-11th: Surviving a short-staffed Applebees Inspection

July 12-21st: Vacation in the Southwest

July 22nd & 23rd: Doubles at the 'Bees

Today: First day back at the Democratic Office

But before I could come in today, I had to deal with a lost debit card and orientation for an ESL conversation class I'm teaching in August. So instead of 10:00, I didn't get here until 12:00.

A lot of what I've been doing today is office operations related. Doing a lot of cleaning, moving some of our new Obama computers around. I also helped Bro' with a mailing, talked with JKR, was going to send out a absentee ballot request (but the dems changed my password, so I don't know how to log into the VAN (voter database) anymore, and can't do that until I see D), and now I'm working on my senior outreach stuff. I've decided Iowa has too many senior homes/apartments.

I still haven't been able to sit down with D. since I got back, so I'm not sure what all I'll need to work on in the coming days, but some things include creating a "Front Desk 101" handout - telling volunteers how to man the front desk when I'm not here - and also updating the HQ Phone List to reflect all the new Obama numbers.

Today has been a hard day. I've been working on this project so long that it is really hard to keep going on the senior outreach database. I've also been without my computer and/or internet for almost two weeks, so there was a truck-load of email and other things to go through that also provided distractions. I think I might spend my evening at the coffee shop, with my computer and my work... just kind of plow through more of it all at once. See if that helps at all.

Catch-Up

I started a second, paying, job at Applebee's which has greatly reduced the amount of time I spend at the Democratic office each week. I am still doing things around here though.

Some recent developments include taking over more of the office operations - like making sure it stays clean and that we have all the supplies we need - tending Pottsie's candidate while she does call time (calling people to ask them for money). I've also started on more community outreach projects - like the college research, but this time focusing on senior populations. Pretty exciting.

What's actually exciting is that there's been some major reorganizing of staff and a dramatic increase in the number of political staffers in our office. The drama was that the Obama for America campaign took over the Coordinated Campaign of the Democratic Party. Those of us who used to work for the Coordinated are now Obama staffers (or out of a job, cause that happened too, just not in our office). This demonstrates a shift in focus for the party. Instead of having a campaign dedicated to mobilizing voters for all candidates, we now are focused on growing and riding the wave of increased political interest Obama has been able to stir in voters since the primaries. The hope is if people are mobilized because they want to vote for Obama, there will be a trickle-down effect of mobilization for the local races as well. The office is a mix of various levels of pessimism, indifference, and optimism for this new plan of action. Now we have 12 staffers plus canvassers and two part-time junior interns. A complete list of characters follows:

Nymphadora, Campaign Manager for state house

Bro', (formerly J.), Campaign Manager for 2 state senate candidates

Pottsie, Campaign Manager for state house (easiest candidate to manage)

P-Fen, Pottsie's intern

D., formerly the IDP Coordinated Campaign Regional Field Director, now the Obama RFD and my boss

Obamapapa, Canvasser and now a regional Obama staffer (and kindof an Obama fanatic)

Newbie, Campaign Manager for a very young, boyish-looking state house candidate

C., canvass team leader

Semi-Colin, formerly a Coordinated Campaign Field Organizer, now an Obama FO

JKR, formerly a Coordinated Campaign Field Organizer, now an Obama FO

Escritora, I think she's a third Obama FO, but I'm not sure; we just met today.

Buttercup and Grey are the two high school interns. Buttercup does my job in the evenings when I can't be here and does data entry for the FOs. Grey is supposed to do things for the FOs, but has sort of been monopolized by Pottsie. One of the unfortunate consequences of the loosey-goosey thing our office has going on (which we usually enjoy) is that those sorts of misunderstandings sometimes happen. Grey's been able to do some things for other campaigns recently though.

I gotsta go to the 'Bees now though... more updates later.